Hind's Head

Continuing with the self referential theme, we also went to Heston's lesser known pub in Bray whilst we visited. As I read somewhere, Heston does seem to be taking over the little village much like how Rick Stein took over Padstow, but in some ways, I found the Hind's Head to be even more exciting than its famous neighbour 3 doors' down.

One thing I didn't mention in the Fat Duck post was that I didn't think the decor of the place was that successful. I think it was a pub conversion, and you can still see a lot of exposed beams. But the dining room is relatively small, and the beams felt oppressive, and also slightly out of place in the modern interiors. It gets even weirder when you go upstairs, where the toilet is ultra ultra modern, and there is this weird vacant space which they obviously are not sure what to do with.

But the beams at Hind's Head are exactly right. In an olde worlde pub, the beams give a cosy feel, it's just a shame that there were definitely a few WAGs in the pub who didn't quite fit in with their very small dresses. I also loved the fact you have to duck quite a bit to get the loo at the Hind's Head. Were people really that much smaller hundreds of years ago?

Anyway, the reason why I was quite excited was even though we were about to have a 13 course dinner next door, we still sneaked a peek at the menu. Lots of pub classics like good fashioned steak pies, bangers and mash, etc., but also a few edgier additions, including raw scotch beef with capers, half lobster and chips. And the prices are not ridiculous given its pedigree - about £8/10 for a starter, £12/15 for a main. It is obviously blooming far away to go for a pub lunch, but you can tell it would be cooked superbly.

And we did manage to try a few of the Hind's Head bar snacks to get us through to 9pm when our FD booking was. Unfortunately their very famous triple cooked chips was not on the menu - apparently there has been a change to the potato season - so we had to settle for normal French fries. Not very exciting as you can imagine. This was accompanied by Warwickshire wizzers (basically posh cocktail sausages) and a Scotch quail egg:

It's a shame we were all pretty hungry and dived in and scoffed the lot within 5 minutes, because the quail egg was such a wonder it deserved a picture. Somehow, they manage to keep the yolk of the egg soft, and given the size of a quail's egg, that's no mean feat! The sausagemeat encasing the egg was also wondrously fibrous and meaty. In fact, I would hazard to say that out of all the food I ate in that little village, that little egg was the thing that impressed me the most.

As a joke, we actually did wonder into the Waterside Inn to see if we could make a reservation - and somehow we managed to get one within the next 2 months. We did have a look at the menu, and it does look like I will have to take out a second mortgage to continue eating like this - starters at around £40, it'd better be good! Maybe I should ask for a few of those quail's eggs to takeaway in case it isn't...

Fat Duck

When I received the call from Peter inviting me to the Fat Duck at the last minute, I wasn't entirely sure how to feel about it. On the one hand, of course I was excited. Someone had gone through the whole booking palaver and got me a space at what one of the most talked about restaurants of the moment. For a foodie, you cannot be unexcited.

On the other hand though, the inverted snob in me didn't want to get sucked in by the hype. I'm actually very sceptical about the whole concept of molecular gastronomy: It feels more like chemistry than cooking, so clinical that I feel it saps all the passion out of creating something nice to eat. One friend argued that once you get to a certain level of cooking, there is very little creativity left, especially as it's all about the ingredients, and this sort of playing with food allows the chefs to push the boundaries a little further. I was interested to find out.

The crowd at the restaurant completely justified my scepticism about the hype. We were unfortunately sat next to a young lad and his dad, ostentiously celebrating the completion of his GCSEs. The kid was hilariously precocious, braying on and on at daddy about what a truly tremendous opportunity we have here, to dine at one of the country's very best, an experience with which even the past dinners at La Gavroche cannot compare. We guessed correctly that the young lad could only be a product of Eton College. Having to put up with their conversation for 2 hours I guess was a way to sum up the complete style-over-substance of our meal.

That sounds a bit dismissive, but it's not really intended to be. It certainly is style over substance, but it is impressively stylish, and I would say I had a tremendous experience. I really liked Giles Coren's review of the place, where he didn't even try to explain what goes on. Actually, the fact that I'd heard so much about what happens during the tasting menu meant there was little element of surprise, which I guess is partly the point.

Great sensations for the sight, hearing, and smell then, but such a shame it was not really matched by taste. There were only 2 dishes of the 13 course tasting menu that I thought were outstanding (the foie gras and the much talked about egg and bacon ice cream), where the combinations achieved were just singing in my mouth. However, I'm not sure that makes up for the fact that there was one truly disgusting dish that I failed to finish. The Anjou pigeon had been cooked so slowly to retain a lot of its raw texture, but the mouth feel is so foul that I did feel like gagging whilst eating it. Combined with blood pudding, even someone with a strong stomach like me had to push to one side. The wine gums, which were literally gummy sweets made of wine, would be one of those overly-alcoholic sweets that no one goes for even at Christmas, if it didn't have the funky presentation to go with it. For many of the other dishes, I remember what 'happened', but nothing of how they felt on the palate.

I thought the best way would be to leave my commentary here, but I will present all 13 courses as we saw them.
Given the quality of the photos, you will have obviously guessed I didn't take them! They are courtesy of Eunice, who came with a proper ass camera and some amazing technical ability.

LIME GROVE

Nitro Poached Green Tea and Lime Mousse

RED CABBAGE GAZPACHO

Pommery Grain Mustard Ice Cream

JELLY OF QUAIL, CRAYFISH CREAM

Chicken Liver Parfait, Oak Moss and Truffle Toast

ROAST FOIE GRAS

Gooseberry, Braised Konbu and Crab Biscuit

MOCK TURTLE SOUP (c. 1850)

"Mad Hatter Tea"

"SOUND OF THE SEA"

SALMON POACHED IN LIQUORICE

Artichokes, Vanilla Mayonnaise, Golden Trout Roe and Manni Olive Oil

POWDERED ANJOY PIGEON (c. 1720)

Blood Pudding and Confit of Umbles

TAFFETY TART (c. 1660)

Caramelised Apple, Fennel, Rose and Candied Lemon

THE NOT-SO-FULL ENGLISH BREAKFAST

Parnsip Cereal

Nitro-Scrambled Egg and Bacon Ice Cream

Hot & Iced Tea

CHOCOLATE WINE "SLUSH" (c. 1660)

Millionaire Shortbread

WINE GUMS

Historic Trade Routes of Britain

"LIKE A KID IN A SWEET SHOP"

One last word. As I was inserting all these photos, it suddenly occurred to me how self-referential it all was. There is so much Fat Duck packaging and merchandising, you almost wonder whether Heston is just having you on; each diner is given a menu with a Fat Duck wax seal, as well as the Fat Duck cereals, Fat Duck sweeties to take away... At least I hope it is ironic, surely you can't take this all seriously.